feedback jeder art Run Away (Dezember 2020)

[Laura Marie]

 

And again another day is over

Somehow it feels like the days last longer

From day to day my world gets darker

Life’s just getting harder and harder

 

To be honest, I don’t know where I’m at

I feel completely lost and somehow misled

My life consists of hopelessness and fear

I’m so tired of being here

 

Nevertheless, I pretend to be alright

But in the end I stay awake all night

Darkness is the only thing I can see

And then I realize life’s not what it used to be

 

My head is full, my feelings are dead

I’ve lost it all, I’m just a silhouette

I don’t see a reason why I should try

It’s almost like I fell out of the sky

 

I feel like a stranger walking outside

A stranger whose world’s turned into black and white

Have lost all joy and only feel pain

I wish that I could fly again

 

When I look up, the only thing I can see

Is how they blaspheme and glare at me

Suddenly, I feel a teardrop on my cheek

The others are just so strong and I’m so weak

 

Walking home, but can’t look ahead

The things they said still ring in my head

When I close my eyes, I hear them laugh

I wish that I was good enough

 

I end up sitting on the cold floor

Crying behind my locked door

I realize it’s hard to breathe

Why can’t I just leave?

 

In the darkness I can’t even see the stars

I’m completely devastated and only feel my invisible scars

I look in the mirror and don’t like what I see

That’s not the girl I used to be

 

I miss the times I used to be happy and cheerful

There was no need to worry, life was just wonderful

Adolescence is the most awesome time, they say

While I watch my youth fade away

 

Everthing feels like a waste of time

I know the sun won’t come out and shine

Life’s not what it used to be

I really miss the old, happy me

 

I tried so hard and kept fighting for so long

But now I’m falling apart and can’t carry on

In the end I failed and didn’t succeed

Just realized that there are numerous goals I haven’t achieved

 

Living a life full of emptiness and weakness is hard

Especially when you can’t find a light in the dark

I’m a failure and don’t belong here

My biggest wish is to finally disappear

 

Still waiting for the sadness and pain to subside

I seem to be happy, but I’m broken inside

I fake my smile so they don’t see

But in reality, nobody knows me

 

Hope and confidence are already gone

There is no point in moving on

My mind’s not filled with high spirits or bliss

I think I’m not getting through this

 

They ought not know, so I attempt to hush

I try to hold on, but it hurts too much

I’m gonna run from myself, run far away

Need to calm down, gasp for air and pray

 

Pray that these nightmares finally draw to a close

Pray that I’ll be able to get rid of those shadows

Thinking ‘bout the past makes tears stream down my face

It brings back my memories which no one can erase

 

I don’t know what to do anymore

I’d never felt so misunderstood before

Still can’t keep my life under control

Being able to go on is my only goal

 

Watching out of the window, clouds are passing by

I observe them cover the bright blue sky

Strange things are going on inside me

My eyes get filles with tears silently

 

The weather has changed, raindrops are falling down

I can’t put up with all this, I think I’m gonna drown

The world gets more unbearable day by day

There is no way out but to run away

 

Run away from this intolerant and judgemental society

From all the misery, the melancholic melody and my anxiety

Why do I have to live in a world where peace doesn’t exist?

But unfortunately, here’s too much negativity I cannot resist

 

I feel the crack in my heart that can’t be mended

When will all the torture finally have ended?

Being unpopular is harder than it may appear

And I don’t even understand why I’m still here

 

My sky became darker and my dreams have wiped out

I feel extremely suffocated, what’s this all about?

This is not supposed to be a phase again

It’s a never-ending story of desperation and pain

 

No words can express my deep sorrow

I have no clue whether there’s a tomorrow

Guess I deserve the grief and all that stuff

Why am I not good enough?