feedback jeder art Never Be Returned

[Daisy Picoems]

My whole life has been a frown

With my parents being careless

And watching my brother drown

It only could end up a mess

 

Me being alone

With a Fiesta the only thing I own

Life is hard when you're on the ground

And nothing left to keep you bound

 

Now with humans being greedy

Not caring about nature and the needy

They robbed the freedom of a soul

And put him into a windowed bowl

 

Besides why do they have the right

To tell me which drugs are right?

So I've got a bit of that and this

Probably the only thing I'll really miss

 

So I spend a day in the park

And eat my last meal

But really I'm just waiting for dark

He's pretty big, but it's no fear I feel

 

The setting sun makes me glad

When I take my pills

No wonder he went mad

After years of obeying their wills

 

I'll take a bath with Tilly

You don't know what I mean?

Just think about Free Willy

And over the pools edge I lean

 

The water is cold

I start to swim towards him with a grin

For this shit you've got to be bold

It's the whale who will win

 

The next morning my body was found

With Tilikum carrying me around

I now have left this world

And will never be returned

[Freiform]

Hallo Daisy,
deine neun Strophen erzählen einen sehr traurigen Lebenslauf, der mit einem Freitod des LI endet und mich betroffen macht.
Ein Freitod löst für das LI keine Probleme und sein Leben hinzugeben, verschließt dem LI nur die Möglichkeit sein Leben selbst in die Hand zu nehmen und zu einem besser zu machen. Jeder Freitod ist einer zu viel und spiegelt das versagen vieler Menschen im Umgang miteinander. Sehr gerne gelesen und reflektiert. 

 

Grüßend Freiform